A Trip to the Chiropractor

So I have a new friend. He's a chiropractor. I remember the good old days when I used to make friends at parties or playing sports. Now all my new friends have offices and medical supplies.

He was funny. The first medical professional I didn't so much mind going to see. He had a Riders garbage can in his office. His dad coached the Yorkton Terriers.

He said, have you ever been in a car accident?

I said, yes. A long time ago.

He said, did the car roll?

I said, yes.

He said, who was driving?

I said, me.

He said, was it your parents car?

I said, yes.

He said, was it a truck?

I said - look, I feel like I'm on trial here. No, it wasn't a truck. It was a car.

Then I sheepishly added - it was a brand new car.

He said - I'm writing that down...R-O-L-L-E-D--P-A-R-E-N-T-S--B-R-A-N-D--N-E-W--C-A-R.

He said - And now I'm going to underline BRAND NEW twice.


Wait...on second thought, he wasn't funny at all.

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It appears I have two vertebrae's giving me problems so he insisted that I see him all next week. Fine I said, but can I still play ball? He said, NO, but if I choose to then I am not allowed to complain about it. I said fine. I won't complain. (I probably will though).

Then he said, we are closed next friday so I can only see you until thursday.

I said that's fine cause I'm leaving wednesday so I can only see you till wednesday anyway.

He said, ok well I guess we'll just have to fix you in three days then.

I said, Yes make sure cause I have to golf thursday and then waterski at the cabin and my ball finals are next monday.

He looked at me.

He finally said, you know, the worst things you can do are golf, bat and waterski because with these things your head is tilted forward and the spinal compression and then with the swing, the rotation....blah, blah, blah....and he had his little toy spine out and was bending and twisting it up as he spoke to show me what happened to the little bones and nerves when my bat hit the ball. It wasn't pretty.

When he FINALLY stopped, I stared at the knarled toy spine in his hand for a minute, then looked him in the eye and said, So you're saying that I should make some appointments for the week after too then?


For all that, I got a smile, an eye-roll, and three full weeks worth of chiropractor appointments. It sure didn't take him long to realize that he may be funny and knowledgeable and perhaps even a little scary, but I will always be the stubborn middle child who is going to do it anyway.